Abramelin, day 261

Morning rite went well. Missed noon prayer rite due to one meeting after another from 11:30 until I left work. Wow. It may be the first one I’ve missed since I started the Abramelin. Gods.

Paranoid as hell about that almond wand, still no word and it’s been over a week. So do I go ahead and start the final week next Wednesday and gamble that it’ll reach me in time for the conjuration? What the hell do I do? I’m a bit panicked. Taking off two weeks as a new employee is beyond problematic; if I can’t finish in conjunction with Christmas vacation/break I don’t know what the hell I’m going to do.

Trying to focus on what I need to focus on but so much going on. Readily admitting to focusing on shit that shouldn’t matter, probably because the stuff that does is too stressful to think about right now.

Evening rite went as well as could be expected.

Abramelin, day 260

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Still no word on the almond wand. I know that it needs to arrive by the 21st if I’m going to proceed according to how I planned it, and now the silence is getting nail-biting. Ridiculous.

My new job remains pretty cool. This is a massive stress relief.

I am painfully aware of the fact that I still have a LOT of shit to work on but if I wait to be perfect nothing will ever get accomplished.

Evening rite went well.


Abramelin, day 259

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Was totally right on the cause, dialed down the protein and doing way better. Stomach is now a lot happier.

Still no word on the almond wand. No idea what to do other than wait.

Personal shit is still being burned through but it’s escalating hardcore. Just going to trust myself and my gods at this point as I’ve got nothing left.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 258

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Some personal struggles still. I despair at certain shit remaining unresolved until after the Abramelin, but we can’t all be perfect.

I think I figured out the problem with my stomach. I had suspected it to be the case but wasn’t completely certain. I changed the balance of my diet from 50-25-25 (% calories from carbs, fats, and proteins) to 40-30-30 and my body didn’t like the sharp increase of protein. At all. I’m going to switch back to 50-25-25 and see if that resolves things. I may also have to talk to some people and find out if I need special enzymes in my diet or something. Ridiculous.

Started my CPT exam prep class today and moved to the new office space at work. I now share an office and have a desk next to the window with a beautiful view of downtown Boston. Life is good. I will say however that this is the strangest job I’ve ever had, and the absolute worst case of disorganization in the history of ever. I don’t dislike it but wow, it is complete chaos. But I’m receiving good benefits and paychecks so…so be it.

Still no word on the wand. I have NO idea now if it’ll even be possible to finagle the time off of work without promising to be able to work from home. I suspect my final week, like much of the operation, will come with some compromises. No excuses, as they say.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 257

Morning and noon rite went well. Morning done in bed because still wasn’t feeling well.

Managed to have groceries delivered to me, signed up for the advanced nutrition course, and got food prepped for the week. Managed a workout later once I wasn’t feeling like crap.

Also found a velvet white robe/dress that I MAYBE wore once and I can’t even remember doing that. Machine washable, too. I appear to be set on tools, now just to get that final update on the almond wand.

Still having stomach issues, so am drinking tea and water infused with lemon. Good shit. This is clearly how I will survive. I have NO idea what’s going on but it’s severely limiting my food intake. Pumping in the fluids and sleeping more than usual. What more can I do?

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 256

Morning and noon rite went well.

Crazy dreams, VERY crazy, all Abramelin themed or referenced.

Okay, the stomach shit HAS to stop. Is it a minor bug? Food poisoning? What? I’m going to have to do nothing but mostly liquids until it calms the fuck down.

Diploma in Personal Nutrition earned, nearly aced the exam. Yay! Now onto the CPT certification with NASM.

Evening rite okay but done in bed, no choice.

Abramelin, day 255

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Found out I’ll be sharing an office with someone and will not only get a degree of privacy but will have a window seat. Who got me this job again? I owe that deity/daemon lavish gifts and hugs.

Still waiting on the official word on when my almond wand is going to reach me.

Stomach having issues AGAIN. Went to bed early. Starting to wonder if this is beginning to resemble some weird pregnancy crap due to the rite. Evening rite went well, albeit done in bed.

Abramelin, day 254

Morning rite went well, noon prayer rite I barely managed to make in but felt went okay regardless.

I can see why this job is good for me: there’s been hardly any work since I started since they’re still scrambling around for the project requirements and hiring more people. It gives me the downtime I need before I end this rite, which if all goes well with that almond wand should be soon.

I still feel like I have a lot to work on but I am grateful to have come as far as I have, above and beyond grateful. I can’t begin to express that enough. I am in a VERY different place than when I started.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 253

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Email from the almond wand maker, it’s apparently in process and should be sent out to me either at the end of this week or beginning of next week. Not sure on ETA but once I have a better idea I’ll know if I can request the time off from my boss before Christmas time as originally planned. I figured this operation would take nine months, so unless the gods see fit to provide any further delays…so be it.

Already on the lookout for a white robe, have the red over robe already plus the black one. I may even have the belt. Interestingly, I can’t help but feel the white robe is something like a bridal gown.

Lots to work on. I have felt the heat turn up significantly over the past few weeks but wow. I won’t lie; I’m a little terrified and anxious. I hope all will go well. All in the hands of the gods now, however.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 252

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Stomach issues AGAIN, this time I was in so much pain I thought I was going to puke. What HAVE I been doing differently to deserve this agony? The only thing I can think of, interestingly enough, is too much protein and not enough water.

Still no word on the almond wand.

Work picking up, crazy town on FB today, and almost done with my nutrition certification course in time to start my course to help me prep for my personal training certification exam. Still burning through personal issues but made some breakthroughs.

Evening rite went well.