Abramelin, day 54

Morning rite went well. I’m feeling…a bit out of sorts today, detached and drifting, but strangely good. I find myself able to observe when I react in ways that I normally do, and stop myself from once again being in the usual fashion which does not serve me.

I have also done some recalculating…apparently phase two starts this Friday. I had a feeling things were “escalating” and this confirms it; hence my double checking on when I’m supposed to be “moving on”. My HGA has me right on schedule even when I myself don’t know it. That makes me feel good/better about this whole situation. At the same time…I am absolutely terrified of moving forward. I guess I got comfortable in this phase…maybe too comfortable. >.> And I know, were I giving advice to someone else, that would be when I would say “That means you are ready to move on, cause sayonara, comfort zone!”

Meanwhile, I am participating in a major charity walk this weekend…which means I get to spend the start of phase two in a hotel and walking a fuckton amount of miles. Holy. Fuck.

So much uncertainty. Tomorrow is another day.

Evening rite went well.

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