Abramelin, day 59

Morning rite went well. Today was a bit of a blur, owing to the lengthy walk and exhaustion. I find myself questioning and second guessing a lot of things. I know I am lacking in sleep and it’s making things fuzzy. I know that I need to be better prepared for things and treat myself better, but have no idea on how to go about doing that. For some reason I just can’t shake the notion that I’m either swinging in the direction of being the biggest screw up or just plain trying too hard. I need that middle ground, and I have no idea where to find it.

Evening rite went well. My daily meditations and contemplation will be done before I fall asleep tonight.

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