On being magic

This was a blog post I was going to make before the total proverbial shit hit the fan and I had to make a post about that instead. What I am about to discuss is a case of “no one’s wrong, it’s just a matter of different perspectives and words getting in the way of understanding.” It’s a kinder, gentler post, but no less important. So without further adieu….

I posted a link to a blog a week or so ago entitled Magick, Money, & Bullshit: Do the F**cking Work. Literally my only complaint about this post was the need to censor an excellent word such as “fucking”, but I digress. One of the best parts about it was this section here: “Magick isn’t something you do. Magick is something YOU ARE. How you think. How you live. How you love. How you behave all affect any magickal working you perform.” 

When I posted this to Facebook, I was surprised at a few who didn’t seem to understand the spirit of what was being said, namely “Magick isn’t something you do. Magick is something you are.” One felt the need to point out that magic(k) is a practice while another voiced the idea that once you hit Adepthood, magical practice is something you do less often out of pursuit of other things. Neither of these statements are “wrong”; they just weren’t the point that I felt the deep need to express and celebrate. I also fell short of being able to explain it on Facebook, as the medium really isn’t sufficient for this sort of discussion. Expressing why magic is who you are and not just what you do requires more than it provides.

Magic is a mindset. It’s a mentality. There is no separation between your “mundane” life and your “magical” life, and when you live out your life in a way that expresses that, all of the barriers towards manifestation come tumbling down. It’s not just something you do when you’re lighting that candle, casting that spell, doing that working, this invocation, robing up and entering your temple room, or spending all of your hard earned money over at Wolf & Goat.

Yes Virginia, you ARE magic. This is why it’s so important to take care of yourself, get your physical needs met, and don’t neglect any part of your life. If there’s an area where you’re struggling to manifest something take a good look at why. Maybe it’s your approach, maybe it’s something you haven’t quite digested yet, or maybe you’ve been treating it as something you’re not yet worthy of. Maybe you’ve only done it when you desperately needed to as opposed to making it something you do on a regular basis, like brushing your teeth. Perhaps it’s a fear of failure o the belief that magic is somehow limited to certain things. It’s time to put all of that away and set aside the notion that you’re not deserving. Yes, you ARE worthy. You don’t need to feel guilty or make excuses as to why you can’t do money/job/career magic or any sort of magic; you are the vessel from which the power of the gods flow. You are a magical being, and with every step you take to perfect both the person whom you are and what you put forth into the world, you can make the world around you more in touch with the very essence of magic.

I’ve always found that magicians who quote the statement “As above, so below” and yet draw lines in the sand on their spiritual/personal and “mundane” lives to be demonstrating a sad cognitive dissonance. Repeat after me: it’s all the same. There are no lines, no boundaries, no differences between them. You cannot keep your altars tidy and not extend that into the rest of your life, and while doing one can help to improve the other it’s not enough. Take action, get it done.

One of my magical teachers once said to me that magic is about making a connection. And it’s true. We need to make connections between all of the bits of our lives, and if it’s the physical world we’re struggling with we cannot continue to divorce ourselves from it. Ultimately it’s about striving for what is termed in my faith as aretéexcellence in all things and living up to one’s full potential.

Don’t just do magic, be magic.

Abramelin, day 262

All sorts of HGA related dreams last night. He came in one of the forms he showed up in my dreams years and years ago. So strange.

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Busy day at work today, but very aware that I am working with some really cool people. Incredibly grateful beyond words to have this job. How did I get it again? So much gratitude.

Decided to email the wand maker and get a status, got an email back saying they would look up a tracking number for me. Did some math and looking at the calendar, figured worst case scenario is I start on the 27th.

On my way walking home from the train heard a voice in my head asking if I was ready. Came home to a box on my doorstep, containing…yes. I will be starting on the 17th for sure, and will be in radio silence until done. I am nervous, excited, fucking terrified…gods.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 237

Morning and noon prayer rite went well.

Job is going well so far, hopefully will stay that way! They are giving me high hopes and it’d be nice too finally be in a place I can stay in for a while AND have time to work on my side businesses until I can leave IT.

Stomach still upset and sensitive. When did I ever get this sensitive? Will need to watch what I eat next few days if much of anything at all.

Evening rite went okay, but had to go to bed early because I wasn’t feeling well. Only third time ever during the operation I’ve had to do it in my room instead.

Abramelin, day 236

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

Schedule changes in my life don’t help me too much. I need to figure out what to do with myself besides being online and working out when not at work. I think I have some intense personal stuff I’m still avoiding and I need to start digging into that.

I also need to start getting more sleep. It’s affecting my eating habits and everything else. I’m also a LOT more physically active than I normally am, which is great. I think I need to take in more quality food.

Evening rite went well, all things considered.

Abramelin, day 235

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

I can’t believe it’s taken me 235 days to finally get someone to comment on my entries and ask me what it means when I say a rite “went well”. Honestly, much of the time they are satisfying but sometimes they are not. Sometimes I am whining or ranting during these. If you go back during some of the entries I touch upon that. This has NOT been an easy couple of months besides, but a number of miracles have helped me along the way.

I dunno, maybe I need another FAQ that goes something like this:

Q: Why are you doing this rite?
A: To torture you all, my beloved minions and striped jellyfish.

Q: But what do you hope to get out of the Abramelin??
A: A sweet, sweet blog. And questions like these!

Q: But I’m skeptical, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? WHYYYY
A: Because I’m here to torture you and make you ask these questions!

Q: But this I think that this rite is stupid and it won’t work waaaa
A: Then by all means, don’t do it! I don’t want you to do anything you think is stupid because that would be like stupid or something.

Q: But then WHY ARE YOU DOING IT
A: Why, to annoy you! Is it working yet?

Q: …are you making fun of me?
A: Is water wet?

Q: WHY are you making fun of me??
A: Hermes.

Day three of the new job and I’m still liking the place. I really hope this lasts! I have also learned what my hours are, and I love them to bits. I want to hug them and squeeze them and call them George.

Had some interesting insights today while pissing off all the right people (utterly unrelated to the blog comments, lol). I wanted a sign to let me know whether or not I’m on the right track and I got it, along with a bit of a revealing test. I have no idea if I “passed” or not but I do know that how I react to things now is NOT how I used to react, and I consider that a bonus. I’m not yet where I’d like to be but I’m definitely not where I was, and for that I am super extraordinarily grateful. I commented about this to my friends last night. I am so honestly grateful to not be where I was at the start at this rite let alone last year to the point of tears.

 

Evening rite went well. 😉

 

Abramelin, day 234

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

I think I am missing a day, but I’m not sure. The trip to the Cape has me totally thrown off.

Day two of job went well. I may like it here. Haven’t done any real work yet so hard to say. I never really know until after the first couple of months.

After work got to hang out with a few people from my coven.

I have a lot to work on but feeling insanely optimistic. I know what I want and I’m defining it more and more all the time. At the same time, I feel like I’ve been doing this rite forever. Am I there yet? lol

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 233

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

This job may actually work out. They work a 37.5 hour week, don’t see any micromanaging thus far, great commute, very nice people. We’ll see.

Feeling good. Battling some personal bullshit but hey, another day in the life of.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 232

Morning and noon prayer rites went well.

Still not sleeping well, hot tubbing and pain meds completely knocked me out. Fought falling asleep during car ride home, went into bed and totally crashed.

Tomorrow is the first day at my new job. I really hope this works out. :-/

Lots of intense, interesting dreams.

Evening prayer rite went well.

Abramelin, day 222

Morning rite and noon prayer rite went well.

I’ve realized that my days and nights are filled with doing divination, magic, seership, mediumship past few weeks. If this isn’t alchemical I don’t know what the fuck is. I’ve been getting my taste of full time magician, witch, and priestess and I’m finding that it comes entirely too natural to me. I feel at home.

Another day in Salem.

Evening rite went well.

Abramelin, day 221

Morning rite went well.

Got unemployment straightened out, scheduled car for repair, and got an energy scan reading, and all before noon today. Fun times!

Another day in Salem.

Evening rite went well.