Abramelin, day 50

LOTS of lucid dreaming past few days, far more so than I have in a while. Lots of psychic shit.

Morning rite went well. Work day however, was challenging. Was entirely too happy to leave early–even working from home–to head to my chiropractor appointment.

A good chunk of the day was devoted to thinking about those themes covered yesterday: rethinking habits of approach, reactions, etc. What reactions am I having which are reasonable and intuition-based versus reflection out of a habit or defensive maneuver.

I am wondering how much of my personal journey and stress for the past few years has been self inflicted versus brought on by outside factors. It’s not a comfortable thought. I would think I would’ve had a heads-up and cosmic spanking machine introduction had it been purely me, but I have no way of really knowing that.

Still in the purge, cleanse, heal cycle. Lots of purifying that I am doing and need to do. I intend to reread the Abramelin accounts I’ve read before so I have a sense of what I’m in for in regards to phase two, but I suspect a good chunk of it is Purify Your Shit. But time will tell.

Evening rite went well. Much to think about.

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